Alcohol abuse has likely ended more marriages and broken up more families than we will ever experience. If you’ve been considering divorcing because of your spouse’s drinking problem, wait! Other options may be available.
When you’re just sick and tired, sick and tired, and you don’t know what to do – when all you’ve done to help the alcoholic just seems to make things worse – and you am By the end of your joke, divorce may seem like the only sensible choice.
I often get emails from readers who say:
“I don’t know what to do! I can’t take it anymore. I just want it to stop! I’m thinking about leaving him, but I really still love him. Besides, when he isn’t drinking, is.” he really is a nice guy … ”
Give Al-Anon a try
If the above statement sums up your situation, this suggestion can benefit you: “Go to an Al-Anon family group meeting.”
Why? Because the people you find in the Al-Anon meeting rooms understand, like few others perhaps, exactly how you feel. They were there too, but they discovered that they can find contentment and even happiness, whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not. As stated in the opening speech, at most Al-Anon Family Group meetings you will read:
“We urge you to try our program. It has helped many of us find solutions that lead to serenity. So much depends on our own attitudes, and when we learn to put our problem into its true perspective, we lose his strength for it dominate our thoughts and our lives.
The family situation will inevitably improve if we apply the Al-Anon ideas. Without this spiritual help, life with an alcoholic is too much for most of us. Our thinking becomes skewed by trying to force solutions, and we become irritable and unreasonable without even knowing it. “
Contribution to the family problem
Getting the problem into its “true perspective” is how Al-Anon has helped many thousands of its members understand and how it has affected the cunning, confusing, and powerful disease of alcoholism every family memberand how Al-Anon saved so many marriages.
There are thousands of stories of how spouses who thought there was no hope for their marriage or the alcoholic in their life found “a priceless gift of serenity” with the tools Al-Anon gave them.
Many Al-Anon members, after reading the Al-Anon books and attending meetings and conversations with others, find that the alcoholic wasn’t the only one in the family who contributed to the chaos. Many find that their reactions, behavior, and attitudes toward the problem had become part of the problem without even realizing it.
Nothing to lose
If they changed their attitude towards the problem and their reactions to the alcoholic, it made a huge difference in their life and sometimes in their marriage.
Perhaps, in your particular situation, the best option is to leave the alcoholic and get a divorce. But before you take such a drastic step, give Al-Anon a chance.
It is recommended that you attend at least six meetings before choosing Al-Anon, as every meeting is different – even in the same room.
Besides, what have you got to lose? There are no fees and charges in Al-Anon and as the old saying goes, “If after six meetings you decide that Al-Anon is not for you, we will be happy to repay your misery.”